I tell myself that I'm the sensitive, deep one. I tell myself that I'm the John Cusack at my high school. I know I'm not, though. I know it. Telling myself to grow up won't do anything: I have to do it. But I don't want to; I want to indulge my immaturity. I want to stay as enamored and ignorant and stupid and crazy and depressed and melancholy as I am right now.